What time is it ? (2)

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What time is it ?

Time to recover

the thread of your numb  life

where you let it slide

 while busy working

all numb

to earn  it

and being all sore


5 thoughts on “What time is it ? (2)”

    1. When reading again I thought “working” would work better. Honestly, I always find I lose something in English (rimes, most of the times). I do not think I can improve much more than this. Maybe it just does not work, but I appreciate your comment. Any idea ?

      Liked by 1 person

  1. I suppose I asked for this challenge :).

    In this context I’d suggest ‘dull’ for ‘numb’. The last four lines are problematic because they flow so well in French. Would it ruin your meaning to suggest:

    ‘while painfully
    slaving away
    to earn it.’ ?

    ‘painful’ would be an alternative to ‘sore’, which suggests a more physical than emotional pain.

    If my French were as good as your English, I’d be happy.

    Liked by 1 person

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